Do I do these things?

"Take heed that you do not do your charitable deeds before men, to be seen by them. Otherwise you have no reward from your Father in heaven. Matthew 6:1

"And when you pray, you shall not be like the hypocrites. Matthew 6:5

"Moreover, when you fast, do not be like the hypocrites, with a sad countenance. Matthew 6:16

As we enter chapter 6 of Matthew’s recounting of the Sermon on the Mount, let’s consider the big picture of the first eighteen verses. In this section Jesus continues to reveal more of the deeper spirituality of His disciples and citizens of His kingdom. Three disciplines of the faith are discussed: charitable giving, praying, and fasting.

In each case Jesus said “When you give… pray… fast…” That He said, When, not If, reveals that these are not special activities to be observed by only some of His followers, but by all of His followers. These are not the only actions undertaken by Christ’s disciples, but are three essential disciplines.

That said, before diving deeper into what Jesus said about these three, how are you and I doing with just these three? Are all three even on the radar? Are all three regular disciplines or only sporadically undertaken? The statistics of how many professing believers give in a biblical manner say only around 13% tithe.(1) When it comes to prayer, how often do we give regular time to prayer, privately, with our families, and corporately in prayer meetings at church? For how many of us is fasting (and not merely from eating) a spiritual discipline?

Before asking “How do I do these things?”, let’s start first with “Do I do these things?”

(1) While a majority of evangelicals say tithing — giving 10% of one's income to the church — is a biblical commandment, only an estimated 13% engage in the practice, while half give away less than 1% of their income annually, a new study shows. Christian Post

On being perfect

Therefore you shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect. Matthew 5:48

I believe that when it comes to the gospel, by far and away, the toughest pill to swallow is that everyone desperately needs a Savior. Without knowing and being jarred by the reality that without Christ, every human being is born spiritually dead and is headed for certain eternal condemnation—why should anyone give Jesus Christ a second thought?

A crucial component of being dead in sin is the delusion of our own basic goodness. All but those who are insane realize that they are not perfect.  The problem lies with the fatal error that our less-than-perfectness doesn’t matter!  Well-meaning Christians, in an attempt to get people to “accept the Lord,” present the Savior as the remedy for any one of a number of lesser problems from which we suffer.  Jesus will give your life purpose. Jesus will help you overcome additions.  Jesus will be your friend.  Jesus will fix your relational, social, and/or financial problems. Etc., etc., etc.

While becoming a Christian will impact all of those things, Jesus came to save His people from their sins (Matthew 1:21)!  He is the one and only remedy for the horrifying fact that no one is perfect, and the end result of being less than perfect—as God in Heaven is perfect—is eternal condemnation.

That said, I sincerely fear for those who have “accepted” the Band-Aid Jesus to heals their boo-boos, without any concern regarding sin, death, and Hell!

I am also convinced that the key to understanding our own sinfulness lies solely in understanding God’s holiness—and that final judgment is based on how we stack up against the perfections of God Almighty.

Interestingly, no one can convince others either of God’s holiness or of their sin as the reason to surrender their lives to Jesus for forgiveness.  We must try, being as loving, persuasive, and passionate as we can be, but only the Holy Spirit can raise the spiritually dead to life.  That is why we must also pray—that the Holy Spirit will do what only He can do to swallow this most difficult gospel pill.

The good news of the Gospel is that once a person is born again by the Spirit of God, and forgiven of his or her sins, God graciously declares His people holy and righteous as Christ is holy and righteous—or perfect as our Father in Heaven is perfect.

Loving neighbors (Pt. 3)

"You have heard that it was said, 'YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR and hate your enemy.' But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax collectors do so? Matthew 5:43-47

We are to love our neighbors and our enemies. Does that about cover it? Not quite. Scripture also reveals a third general category of people we are to love: the brethren—that is, our brothers and sisters in Christ. No fewer than thirteen times in the five short chapters of 1 John, are we reminded about the special relationship we have with, and are to maintain with, our brothers and sisters in Christ. Here are a few points worth pondering on this subject.

Believers have two families: our earthly families and our spiritual families. Our earthly families include biological relatives, in-laws, and sometimes people who are special to us, though they are neither biological, nor in-laws. We understand our love for these dear ones.

In addition, once we are born again, we are adopted into the family of God in which we are brothers and sisters with all who are in Christ. This family can be understood by two circles. (1) All believers everywhere are our brothers and sisters in Christ. This circle is so large that we obviously do not even know the vast majority—though we will in Heaven. (2) Ideally, all believers should also belong to a smaller community of believers in a local church. This smaller circle is important so that we can love and serve brothers and sisters in tangible ways. (This kind of practical, day to day love is nigh unto impossible with the universal Church because it is so big!)

It has been said that “family are people we love who, if we were not family, we might not even like!” That is sometimes true with biological family. It is definitely true of our family in the Christ! How wonderful it is to love the brethren regardless of what we do not have in common. Why? Because we have the most important, and eternal common bond: Our love for Christ in whom we are one family.

Loving neighbors (Pt. 2)

"You have heard that it was said, 'YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR and hate your enemy.' But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax collectors do so? Matthew 5:43-47

Jesus raises the bar of the spirit of the Law once again—and He raises it HIGH! Instead of merely loving our neighbors (and by default, hating our enemies), He tells us we are to love our enemies! Talk about counter-intuitive!

Jesus goes on to question just how loving it is to love those who love us. Even thieves (tax-collectors) and religious hypocrites do as much. If we would love as God loves (v.48), we must also love those who are our enemies.

Romans 5:10 For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life.

It is important to make a point of the fact that loving does not mean we agree with, endorse, or even or like what our enemies do. God loves us but He hates our sin. Likewise, contrary to modern delusions, disagreeing with what someone (and even hating ones destructive actions), does not mean we hate the people who do such things. For instance, we are not Islamiphobes for opposing Islamic terrorism. Neither are we homophobes or transphobes for agreeing with God that their actions are sinfully destructive. But we are to love these people. It is not a love of affirmation but of compassion. We must pray that God would grant sinners hearts of repentance (regardless of their sin).

And note from Jesus’ words about the fact that God gives both the sun and the rain even to those who hate Him. This encourages us to love in practical every-day ways.

We must give the lost the gospel, but we must also demonstrate God’s love toward them.

Next time: Brothers, neighbors, and enemies.

Loving neighbors (Pt. 1)

"You have heard that it was said, 'YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR and hate your enemy.' But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax collectors do so? Matthew 5:43-47

This passage is the last of Jesus’ illustrations intended to show the contrast between the letter and the spirit of the Law. We are familiar with the phrase, “Save the best for last.” Jesus was doing just that in this passage, because (according to Jesus in Matthew 22:37-39), loving God and loving our neighbors are the first and second in the order of greatest commandments.

In this post I want to use Jesus’ words in (v.43) to point out the serious danger in adding to the Word of God. The bald fact is the words “and hate your enemy,” are not in the Law! Remember, Jesus said "You have heard that it was said, you shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' They had heard this misrepresentation of God Law, but they had not heard it from God’s Law. Why? God’s Law does not say that!

How many of us believe the Bible says this or that, when the Bible says no such thing! This is why we need to know the Bible, not what people say the Bible says. The Bible—not what preachers, podcasts, or our devotional books say.

This is why we need not only to memorize scripture, but it is why memorizing scripture with word-perfect accuracy is so vitally important. It is dangerous to not know what the Bible says, but even more dangerous to know what the Bible says—inaccurately!

Justice (& generosity) (Pt. 4)

"You have heard that it was said, 'AN EYE FOR AN EYE AND A TOOTH FOR A TOOTH.' But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. If anyone wants to sue you and take away your tunic, let him have your cloak also. And whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two. Give to him who asks you, and from him who wants to borrow from you do not turn away. Matthew 5:38-42

Let’s talk about what the attitude of grace Jesus was talking about looks like. In a word: Generosity. The last three sentences of the passage are about generosity (as opposed to stinginess!).

While Jesus doesn’t want us to be duped by dishonest people seeking to con us out of our possessions, He wants us to be generous with those who are in need. Sometimes such generosity will cost us our Dignity (turning the other cheek); Comfortability (giving up our coat); Liberty (going the extra mile); or our Property (lending/giving to those in need).

Has not Jesus laid all these aside to save us? Let us follow His supreme example.

Justice (Pt. 3)

"You have heard that it was said, 'AN EYE FOR AN EYE AND A TOOTH FOR A TOOTH.' But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. If anyone wants to sue you and take away your tunic, let him have your cloak also. And whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two. Give to him who asks you, and from him who wants to borrow from you do not turn away. Matthew 5:38-42

Having considered justice, vengeance, and restitution, what about turning the other cheek?

First, in context, “turning the other cheek” is related to the subject of justice. Jesus’ words about turning the other cheek emphasizes our attitudes when wronged. One commentator wrote that we should “be willing to suffer loss yourself rather than cause another to suffer.” This was repeated by Paul in 1 Corinthians 6:1-11.

Second, the attitude of turning the other cheek applies to how individuals relate to each other, not to civil laws regarding society’s God-given responsibility to punish evildoers (Romans 13:1-4). Personal vigilantism, however, is resolutely disallowed.

Third, Jesus is not disallowing an individual from protecting oneself, and/or others, from violent assaults. Though not using the words “self-defense,” Exodus 22 makes allowances for defending one’s property (and person). While one is not to go beyond defending one’s property (and person), there is even an exemption from guilt if one kills an intruder at night while defending one’s property (and person).

Again, we must not read Jesus’ illustrative words of application to the principle of justice, adding more letters of the law. What we must do is understand the heart attitude Jesus was calling disciples to be marked by.

Justice (Pt. 2)

"You have heard that it was said, 'AN EYE FOR AN EYE AND A TOOTH FOR A TOOTH.' But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. If anyone wants to sue you and take away your tunic, let him have your cloak also. And whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two. Give to him who asks you, and from him who wants to borrow from you do not turn away. Matthew 5:38-42

Last time we considered the difference between justice and vengeance (or retribution). We said it is not right to seek damages that amount to more than the actual loss that was suffered.

But wait! God’s law does require that restitution be paid to the one who suffered a loss in addition to the actual loss. Is this a contradiction? It is not a contradiction. What is the difference between restitution and vengeance (or retribution)?

Vengeance (retribution) is a way for the party that was wronged to wrong the other party in return. This is disallowed by God because vengeance belongs to the Lord (Romans 12:19), not to us.

Biblical Restitution is not wrong for at least three reasons: (1) God commands it in several places in the Law (e.g., Exodus 12-22, Leviticus 6, and others). (2) It is written into the Law with prescribed limitations disallowing a person to seek exorbitant sums for relatively minor losses under the auspices of so-called “pain and suffering.” (3) It penalizes the wrong-doer to drive home the point that “crime does not pay.”

I read and recommend a great article entitled 5 Principles of Biblical Restitution. I’ve include the five points below and encourage you to read the entire article (it is not long) by Clicking Here.

1. Offenses requiring restitution are not only horizontal but vertical.

2. Offenses requiring restitution are direct and measurable.

3. Restitution cannot replace repentance.

4. Restitution assumes personal property exists.

5. Restitution doesn’t replace atonement.

Justice (Pt.1)

"You have heard that it was said, 'AN EYE FOR AN EYE AND A TOOTH FOR A TOOTH.' But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. If anyone wants to sue you and take away your tunic, let him have your cloak also. And whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two. Give to him who asks you, and from him who wants to borrow from you do not turn away. Matthew 5:38-42

The next legal letter of the law v. the spirit of the law that Jesus tackles is the difference between justice v. vengeance. Simply restated, Jesus warned that the letter of the law that says, 'AN EYE FOR AN EYE AND A TOOTH FOR A TOOTH,' must not be misunderstood as “make sure you get even—and possibly beyond even.” Instead, it is to be understood as a limit beyond which we may never go.

Human nature desires justice. Why? Because we are created in the image of God who is perfectly righteous. Fallen human nature desires more than justice. We often want more than to justly get even. We vengefully want revenge. You hit me once, I want to hit you back twice. You steal a dollar from me, I want five dollars in return. God’s law about an eye for an eye allows justice, but not revenge.

What do you think about a case when a person slips on a wet floor in a restaurant, and sues for a million dollars to compensate for “pain and suffering? More important that what you or I may think, what does God think?

The law did make provision for restitution with interest. We’ll consider that next time.

To swear or not to swear?

"Again you have heard that it was said to those of old, 'You shall not swear falsely, but shall perform your oaths to the Lord.' But I say to you, do not swear at all: neither by heaven, for it is God's throne; nor by the earth, for it is His footstool; nor by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King. Nor shall you swear by your head, because you cannot make one hair white or black. But let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No,' 'No.' For whatever is more than these is from the evil one. Matthew 5:33-37

Matthew, chapter five, is largely about understanding the spirit of God’s law, rather than merely the letter of it. I pray we all understand by now that Jesus did not come to abolish the law (5:17-20). In fact, the spirit of the law makes the law stricter than does the letter.

Having compared the spirit and letter of the law regarding anger, lust, and divorce, Jesus turned to the subject of oaths. The word swearing in this passage does not refer to the use of profanity, but of oaths. What had been said, both in God’s Word and “to those of old,” is simple: (a) Do not swear an oath falsely, and (b) Fulfill the oaths you take. Simple, and presumably obvious.

Jesus raised the bar by saying, “do not take oaths at all.” Just say what you mean, mean what you say, and do as you said you would do. It is a shame, really, that we can say all sorts of things, with or without the least intention of honoring what we have said. Then, when we want someone to really believe us, we swear that we are telling the truth. Wouldn’t everyone be better off if our word was so reliable that there was no need to swear oaths? In other words: “Let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No,' 'No.'”

Jesus also addressed the fact that we commonly add all manner of provisions to our oaths. Jesus reminded His disciples of some of the silly variations in their day (v.34-36). In our day people say things like: “I swear on my mother’s grave,” and other absurd wordplays. This foolishness not only means we really mean it, but that we really, really mean it! Again how much better if we merely did as we say we would do?

One wise man said, “The more words a man uses to convince us that he is telling the truth, the more suspicious we should be that he is not.”

Does this mean that it is wrong, for example, to swear to tell the truth in court, or to make vows when entering into a marriage covenant? No, it does not. It is understood that in such particularly weighty and official circumstances, oaths are appropriate. Such oaths are a reminder to all parties involved that the unvarnished truth is expected and that there are consequences for defaulting on such oaths.

I particularly like Solomon’s word in Ecclesiastes regarding oaths:

Ecclesiastes 5:2-5 Do not be rash with your mouth, And let not your heart utter anything hastily before God. For God is in heaven, and you on earth; Therefore let your words be few. 3 For a dream comes through much activity, And a fool's voice is known by his many words. 4 When you make a vow to God, do not delay to pay it; For He has no pleasure in fools. Pay what you have vowed-- 5 Better not to vow than to vow and not pay.

Marriage and divorce (Pt. 10)

"Furthermore it has been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”
Matthew 5:31-32

This will be the last offering on what Jesus said about marriage and divorce in the Sermon on the Mount and in Matthew 19:6-9.

6 So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." 7 They said to Him, "Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?" 8 He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery."

Today’s question: Is it possible for a person who professes faith in Christ to divorce without biblical grounds, and subsequently remarry and it not be adultery?

First, the sad reality is that in some cases divorce and remarriage is a serious sin. Being consigned to a life of singleness (and therefore celibacy) is no small matter. This is a screaming reminder of the fact that no one should ever marry without serious consideration—that in the vast majority of cases, biblically, divorce and remarriage is not an option. If more people entered into marriage with this in mind, I dare say some ill-advised marriages would be avoided!

That said, and I may be severely criticized by some for saying what I am about to say, I am convinced that there are instances in which remarriage after a sinful divorce can be permitted.

Even if someone married and divorced without biblical grounds, they may have been young and somewhat foolish. They may never have been taught or counseled about what the Bible says about these things. And there are times when, after a prolonged period of time, a person has learned, and grown spiritually, and has come to grips with the fact that the former divorce was sinful—and has, with genuine godly sorrow, repented. With proper biblical counseling, I believe persons in such circumstances may be eligible for remarriage, even if the former divorce was sinful. This is not to be taken lightly, done hastily, or with a “loophole” mentality, but is our God a God of grace who forgives sins? The Word of God insists that He is. If you have been divorced as a believer without biblical grounds, please seek biblical counsel before considering yourself eligible to remarry.

One last thought: I believe the biggest reason why God hates divorce is that it defiles the parabolic picture: marriage is to be about the love between Christ and His Bride, the Church. Though Christ has biblical grounds to divorce His unfaithful Bride, He continues to forgive and refuses to “send her away!”

I also believe that the second biggest reason why God hates divorce is because of what it does to the children. One of Satan’s most insidious lies is that sometimes divorce is better for the children. Listen, though children survive divorce, they are always scarred by it. Is there any wonder that, statistically, children of divorce are more likely to divorce as adults? (There are a host of other alarming statistics about the detrimental effects of divorce on children.)

Our happiness in marriage is of great importance. Accurately representing Christ’s love for His Bride is more important. And so is the welfare of our children.

Marriage and divorce (Pt. 9)

"Furthermore it has been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”
Matthew 5:31-32

We are nearing the end of our meditations on what Jesus said about marriage and divorce in the Sermon on the Mount and in Matthew 19:3-9.

6 So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." 7 They said to Him, "Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?" 8 He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery."

Today’s question: If divorced persons remarry, are they entering a life of adultery? Answer: Not necessarily. There are differences of opinions. The danger when there are a variety of positions on a controversial question is to choose the one we like best. Our responsibility is to prayerfully look at all that God’s Word says on the matter and ask for biblical wisdom.

One thing is for sure: In some cases the remarriage is adultery. Otherwise, why would Jesus have said so on two separate occasions?

As for the occasions when the remarriage is not adultery, some say a first marriage that ends due to anything but a death cannot be followed by any second marriage. I believe the Bible teaches otherwise. As much as a divorce for biblical grounds is lamentable, it appears to me that Jesus (and Paul in 1 Corinthians 7), makes allowance for remarriage as long as the divorce was for biblical grounds.

Others make additional allowance if the first marriage and divorce took place before a person was born again. After all, when we come to Christ, we enter a new life and past sins are wiped away. This would suggest that getting married again is permissible. I would add that if both parties become saved, reconciliation and remarriage may be an option to explore.

To that I would add that the Old Testament law (Deuteronomy 24:1-4) disallows remarrying a former spouse who has been married to another in the meantime. I honestly cannot say whether that principle does or does not apply to New Testament believers, assuming former divorces were based on biblical grounds, and whether the parties were saved or became saved later. Complicated isn’t it? No wonder God hates divorce (Malachi 2:16)!

But what if former divorces were not for biblical grounds and the person was a believer when the divorces took place? Next time…

Marriage and divorce (Pt. 8)

"Furthermore it has been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”
Matthew 5:31-32

We are in the midst of exploring what Jesus said about marriage and divorce in Matthew 19:3-9. This time we’ll focus on what Jesus said about “grounds” for divorce in verses 6-9.

6 So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." 7 They said to Him, "Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?" 8 He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery."

Are there biblical “grounds” for divorce? Though some may say, No, I believe the biblical answer is Yes. Rather than go back over what was written in Part 2 of this series on marriage and divorce, let’s move forward past the obvious biblical grounds for divorce, which is sexual infidelity. (Go back and read Part 2 if you can.)

Traditionally, Christians have said abandonment is also a biblical grounds for divorce. Is that true? Possibly in some cases, but it is never stated explicitly in the Bible. What is stated in 1 Corinthians 7:12-15 is as follows:

12 But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. 13 And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. 15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace.

From this, we can deduce that if (and only if ) an unbelieving spose leaves or divorces a believing spouse, the believing spouse is free (presumably to divorce). There are several “howevers” that beg to be mentioned.

(1) This does not mean the spouse who has been left must divorce. He or she may certainly remain married, praying that the unbelieving spouse may repent, and hopefully get saved, and return. There is no set amount of time after which the believing spouse is free to divorce, but since he or she could have divorced already, he or she may opt to do so later as well.

(2) This does not mean a married believer can drive a nonbelieving spouse away so he or she can blame the breakup on the nonbeliever.

(3) There is another scenario which is rather complex. Husband and wife both profess faith in Christ. One is in serious sin from which he or she refuses to repent. In such cases the elders of the church should proceed with the appropriate steps of church discipline, officially calling the one in sin to repent. Eventually (and this must not be rushed!), if the one in sin refuses to repent, he or she may end up being excommunicated. Jesus and Paul both said the one who is excommunicated is to be treated as an unbeliever (Matthew 18:17, 1 Corinthians 5:11). Some argue in such cases the believing spose may divorce the the one who has been excommunicated, since he or she is now considered to be an unbeliever. This is not explicitly taught in scripture. I believe that it is implicitly taught and that this scenario can be defended. However this is not a loophole to be exploited, nor is it to done in haste.

Next time: What about Jesus’ words (Matthew 5:32, & 19:9) regarding those who divorce unbiblically being in adultery?

Marriage and divorce (Pt. 7)

"Furthermore it has been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”
Matthew 5:31-32

We are in the midst of exploring what Jesus said about marriage and divorce in Matthew 19:3-9. This time we’ll focus on what Jesus said about divorce in verses 6-9.

6 So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." 7 They said to Him, "Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?" 8 He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery."

Here are the first three key points about divorce according to Jesus:

(1) When a man and a woman are married, the two become one flesh (c.f., Genesis 2:24). (2) This union is accomplished by God in a spiritual sense. (3) What God unites, man has no authorization to separate.

Do not miss that biblical marriage is only always between one man and one woman who are husband and wife.

Matthew 19:4-5 And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE,' 5 and said, 'FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH' ?

ANY other combination is NOT biblical and is therefore NOT marriage—no matter what anyone says or what laws are passed.

It is ironic that opponents of marriage often claim that “marriage is a man-made institution.” That God unites a husband and wife (according to Jesus) makes it clear that biblical marriage is not of human origin.

Meanwhile opponents of biblical marriage (one man and one woman) seek to redefine marriage legally, which makes their feeble attempts to overrule God regarding marriage, nothing but a man-made institution.

The uniting of husband and wife as one is of a spiritual nature. Clearly, the two have distinct bodies and retain their separate identities, but become one in a spiritual sense. This is in keeping with the fact that marriage is a picture of the union of Christ and His Church. The Church is united with Christ (John 17:21) in a manner similar to the way that the three Members of the Trinity are One, yet Three: “distinct, yet never separated.”

And by the way, Jesus will never divorce His church (Hebrews 13:5)—even though He has cause!

More on biblical grounds for divorce next time.

Marriage and divorce (Pt. 6)

"Furthermore it has been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”
Matthew 5:31-32

We are in the midst of exploring what Jesus said about marriage and divorce in Matthew 19:3-9. Particularly Matthew 19:4-6:

And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE,' and said, 'FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH' ? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."

Last time we pointed out what is abundantly clear on its own: There are only two genders. Male and female. Additionally, gender is not a social construct and people cannot change genders no matter how much hormone therapy and or body mutilation they undergo. What has this to do with marriage? Much—in fact, everything.

Like gender, marriage is not a social construct. Both were ordained and established by God in the first two chapters of the Bible. You may disagree with what the Bible says, but this is precisely what it says.

And for what purpose did God ordain and establish marriage? Here are three answers:

Special companionship. After creating Adam, God declared that it is not good for man to be alone. And then He created Eve, a woman. Why did God not create another man? Because according to God, humans need special companionship that cannot be found with another of the same gender. This marriage relationship between a man and a woman is so special that God refers to it as the unification of two people (1 male and 1 female) who in marriage become one flesh (cf. Genesis 2:24). This life-long union is to be exclusive until one of the persons dies (cf. Romans 7:1-3).

Procreation. The first commands given to human beings in Genesis 1:28 includes the mandate to be fruitful and multiply. Though God created sexual intimacy to be desirable and pleasurable, it does not mean there is no greater purpose. It is through sexual intimacy that human beings are to propagate the human race, and this requires a male and a female. (Those who deny this fact are either ignorant or mentally ill.)

Christ and His Church. The greatest purpose for marriage is that it is a God-ordained living parable about Christ’s love for His Church. Jesus is the Groom and the Church is His Bride. There is only one groom and there is only one bride who are united—not just for life (as is the case of marriage between two mere mortals), but the marriage of Christ and His Church is for eternity. This sinful world has continued to try to redefine marriage as something other than what God ordained. Every such attempt has not only defaced marriage as God ordained, it has also distorted the parable of Christ and His love for His Bride, the Church.

What about divorce? More next time. 

Marriage and divorce (Pt. 5)

"Furthermore it has been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”
Matthew 5:31-32

We are in the midst of exploring what Jesus said about marriage and divorce in Matthew 19:3-9:

Last time we emphasized the importance of conserving the earliest truths God has established in the opening chapters of Genesis, contrasted with the danger of progressing by abandoning those same truths. This time, let’s take note of what truths God established regarding marriage that Jesus noted in Matthew 19. First, there are two, and only two genders: male and female.

Matthew 19:4 And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE,'

To not know and understand this most basic truth is to be deluded on at least two levels.

It is true because God’s Word declares it.

It is true because biology confirms and demands it. Human reproductivity has only happened as a result of a man and woman joining in sexual intimacy. It only happens for that reason and it will never happen except for that reason. Sure, mad scientists are bent on creating life apart from this God-ordained method, but like the fabled Dr. Frankenstein, they will only end up creating a monster. This biological truth is not limited to human beings. Virtually every species of plant and animal life reproduces on a two-gender basis. Those who cite an obscure one-cell organism, or a mollusk in the depths of the ocean that happens to be gender neutral—and who insist on making an exceedingly rare exception to the rule—only succeed in revealing how determined they are to ignore what is obvious even to children. No, gender is not a social construct. It is a theological and immutable, scientific truth.

The idea that one can change genders is both wrong and foolish. One’s DNA, found in every cell in every body, is indelibly stamped either male or female. No amount of drug or hormone therapy, and no amount of body mutilation can change DNA. That these measures are irreversible only compounds the tragic destruction of the lives of those who undergo such ghastly procedures.

Shouldn’t we support those who suffer from gender dysphoria? Yes! But not by cheering them down paths of delusion and destruction. Rather, we must compassionately support them with the truth.

Next time, what does gender have to do with marriage?

Marriage and divorce (Pt. 4)

"Furthermore it has been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”
Matthew 5:31-32

We are in the midst of exploring what Jesus said about marriage and divorce in Matthew 19:3-9:

Matthew 19:4 And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE,'

Last time we mentioned the fact that Jesus identifies one of our common problems: Not reading, and therefore not knowing what God says in His Word. (Go back to read yesterday’s blog if you missed it.)

Next, do not miss that Jesus goes back to the beginning, to Genesis, for God’s baseline for truth. There are more truths (often unknown to many believers) in the first eleven chapters of Genesis that establish the necessary ground floor for numerous matters of Christian faith and practice. God, and the truths He established in the beginning, have not changed.

A basic difference between “conservative” and “progressive” Christians is that conservatives are committed to conserving ancient, established truth. Progressives are committed to reinventing all things new—loving change for change sake. When it comes to what God established in the beginning, we are wise to be conservative—sticking to what He has said. Likewise, we are foolish to disregard what God has established in favor of new ideas and practices based on ever-changing cultures driven by fallen people.

Jesus referred back to creation and the establishment of marriage (as did Paul in 1 Timothy 2:13). When considering just about anything, we do well to ask ourselves if the issue is established in the opening chapters of Genesis. If it is, don’t seek to change it!

That is a little about the importance of going back to the beginning. Next time, what did God establish about marriage from the beginning?

Marriage and divorce (Pt. 3)

"Furthermore it has been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”
Matthew 5:31-32

What did Jesus say about marriage and divorce in Matthew 19:3-9?

Matthew 19:3 The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?"

Jesus’ spiritual enemies were not asking because they honestly wanted an answer. They asked “testing Him,” hoping to trip Him up. How can sinful people trip God up? Obviously they can’t!

Their question stemmed from their unbiblical traditions about marriage that allowed a man to divorce his wife for “any reason,” so long as he completed the necessary paperwork.

Add to that, the fact that only the husband (not the wife) had this easy way out!

Matthew 19:4 And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE,'

Jesus answer begins answering their question with a question, “Have you not read…?” Who even knows what percentage of the problems Christians wrestle with are due to not having read, and therefore not knowing what God’s Word says? I will not pretend to know the actual percentage, but 40 years of experience as a pastor confirms that a super-majority of believers’ problems are due to NOT reading and therefore NOT knowing what God’s Word says. And consider the fact that because of when and where we live, we are surrounded by Bibles.

Which camp are you in? Are you in the camp of those who are reading and learning what God’s Word says in order to know what God says, or are you in the camp of those are clueless because of neglect? (By the way, people in this second category usually do not know how much they do not know!) What do you intend to do about that?

There is a second vitally important talking point in Matthew 19:4. We’ll consider that next time.

Marriage and divorce (Pt. 2)

"Furthermore it has been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”
Matthew 5:31-32

Speaking of loophole mentality, sadly, a fair number of Christians look at Jesus’ words regarding “biblical grounds” for divorce as a loophole to be exploited. Here, and elsewhere in scripture, a biblical grounds for divorce is a breaking of the marriage covenant through adultery (sexual sin), but is it a loophole?

Many years ago I counseled a woman in a bad disastrous marriage to an abusive unbelieving husband. She told me that a Christian friend asked her if her husband had been sexually unfaithful. The wife answered, “No.” “Darn!” erupted the friend. “We can't use that!” Though possibly well intentioned, this friend was hoping to use adultery as a convenient “loophole.” What should we understand about adultery as a biblical grounds for divorce? Two things:

First, it is permitted, but it is certainly not commanded. In other words, sexual unfaithfulness merely allows the spouse who was wronged in this way to divorce the guilty spouse.

Second, Jesus explained (Matthew 19:3-9) that though divorce was allowed, it is greatly preferred that the spouse, who was sinned against, forgive the guilty spouse. The provision of sexual infidelity was therefore allowed because of the “hardness of our hearts” (v.8) when one cannot muster the grace to forgive.

God knows how deeply this kind of sin hurts the one who has been violated. After all, scripture routinely calls sins against God, spiritual harlotry/adultery. How many times everyday do God’s people sin against God and thereby commit spiritual harlotry? And how many times does He forgive us? And are we not to forgive as we have been forgiven? (Ephesians 4:32) So then, forgiveness is to be preferred over divorce.

“But it is hard!” Sure it is. Marriage is hard. Christianity is hard. Didn’t Jesus tell those who were considering following Him:

Matthew 16:24-25 Then Jesus said to His disciples, "If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. 25 For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.

Jesus gave permission, but the greater weight of scripture pleads for forgiveness.

What if the offending party proves to be a serial adulterer, sinning and “repenting” over and over. Such cases can wear anyone down—which is why the Lord allowed this particular “grounds” for divorce.

More on what Jesus said in Matthew 19 next.

Marriage and divorce (Pt. 1)

"Furthermore it has been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”
Matthew 5:31-32

The common practice in Jesus’s day was that a man could divorce his wife for virtually any reason (real or made up), so long as he did the proper paperwork. He had merely to give her walking papers. This mentality reveals a sinister mindset regarding loopholes.

Take this simple test to see if you are one in whom this mindset resides: Am I more likely to evaluate every situation by asking “How holy can I possibly be?” or “How close may I get to sin and get away with it?”

Stated another way, which best describes your heart toward making decisions in life: (1) Do I get to please God with righteous living?” or (2) “Have I got to do certain things to be OK with God?”

So before commenting on marriage in particular, where is your heart regarding living for Jesus? Is it a matter of get to or a matter of got to? Honestly.

The mindset in Jesus day regarding marriage was, “Thank God for the loophole demanding a bit of paperwork that will allow me to divorce.” Among many who claim to be Christians today, the same loophole mindset pervades just about any and every area of life.

Dear God, change our hearts that we would want to follow You no matter the cost, instead of rejoicing that we can sin, and still be saved.